Top 10 things New Yorkers can do to stay sane in '06
I've been asked by Shrinkwrapped to come up with my suggestions for the "Top Ten Things New Yorkers Can Do to Stay Sane in '06."
I'm not ordinarily one for giving advice (I don't think people usually take it), nor am I a New Yorker any more.
But hey, I've been asked, so I'll give it a shot.
Some of the following are specific to New Yorkers. But most are for anyone (including the author: physician, heal thyself!):
(1) Don't believe everything you read in the NY Times. I was going to say "don't believe anything you read in the NY Times," but that would lead to insanity of a different--and more serious--variety.
(2) Walk more. Manhattan's a small place, actually. And when you take the subway, look around and take satisfaction in the amazing diversity that is America.
(3) If watching Bush makes your stomach churn with rage, turn off the TV. I used to do it back when I was a liberal, first with Nixon and then with Reagan. It got me through some hard times.
(4) Forget about trying to eat merely to fuel your body. Food isn't only sustenance. It is pleasure, entertainment, solace, etc., and trying to take that away from the equation will just lead to misery. Ask the Puritans.
(5) Don't try to protect your children from all hurt. It won't help them, and it's impossible, anyway. But don't you be the one to dole out the hurt unnecessarily. There's plenty that will come naturally; your task is to help them get through it.
(6) If you've sustained a loss, remember that grieving doesn't have a time frame. In fact, it can take many years, or even a lifetime. Loss changes you, and there's no going back, so don't expect to.
(7) Visit flyover country at least once. Maybe Kansas City, for some BBQ?
(8) Remember the words of Winston Churchill--almost any words of Churchill will do--but how about these, for starters: "Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm."
(9) When on vacation, turn off your cellphone and stay away from the computer.
(10) Do as I say, not as I do.
[NOTE: Here's the link to Shrinkwrapped's compendium of the psychobloggers' lists.]
posted by neo-neocon @ 12:52 PM
11 comments
11 Comments:
A 20 oz. rare, prime T-bone with a couple of stiff belts of top shelf bourbon knocked back should take the edge of any New Yorker after a hard day in the office and on the streets. The rest of your advice sounds OK too...
Actually, I'd say the best advice for staying sane is simply not to read the Times at all.
Neo, since you're too modest to say otherwise, let me add the obvious: Read Neo-Neocon every day!
Best wishes for a happy 2006 to Neo and all her readers.
(2) Walk more. Manhattan's a small place, actually. And when you take the subway, look around and take satisfaction in the amazing diversity that is America.
The corrolary to that is to carry about 10 different weapons on you. Including your automatic pistol, one knife on both legs for balance, a couple of throwing knives, and some very small and stealthy non-lethal devices that one might need to avoid prosecution such as pepper spray, extremely loud sound devices, and one of those Shock Shooters if you can fit one in your clothes.
The other corrolary, of course, is to know how to use them.
Criminals attack the weak, and there are few as strong in individual fighting ability as an assassin. But you don't need to be an assasssin to scare off the inhabitants of any major metropolitan city.
(7) Visit flyover country at least once. Maybe Kansas City, for some BBQ?
Kerry visited the Marines one time at a fast food joint or cafe. I don't think either of them rubbed off on the other, in a positive way.
(8) Remember the words of Winston Churchill--almost any words of Churchill will do--but how about these, for starters: "Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm."
The corrolary, is of course, if you didn't know Churchill then that would really sound like consolation advice to a retard. Like that guy in Britain hauling pounds of chocolates with his feet, with a sign begging love on his back, and doing it on all fours in the streets.
That is not pathetic. That is pathetically retarded. With enthusiasm at that.
Personally, I don't eat food for comfort. Meditation, stretch exercises, and visualizing violent events tend to produce calm better. Actually, visualizing violent events to your enemies is a form of meditation, but you have to be careful it doesn't become self-hypnosis as well.
I think Dean has um, slipped into the self-hypnosis crevice. ANd he can't get out... ain't that sad. Not really, but still.
Hey Neo, I think you missed 11, which is,
"Don't think about Unions anymore, at all".
Supplements:
(1)Just stop reading the New York Times; try the New York Sun.
(3) If watching Pelosi, Reid, Kerry, Dean, Boxer, Durbin, Kennedy & Co., Carter, Schumer, and both Clintons, makes your stomach turn with rage, switch to a good movie (many bad movies will do) or wait until April for baseball -- not to mention the baseball "World Cup" in March.
ps. Like rickinny's list.
Excellent advice!
That said, obvioulsy, you haven't had Texas BBQ (BBQ negates Texas big hair- yup, it's that good).
SC&A: I thought long and hard about which BBQ to recommend of all the competing varieties. I choose Kansas City for its geographical centrality.
Heavy lies the head that writes the blog--what a responsibility :-)!
2 suggestions for the list:
(1) after unsubscribing to the NYT: subscribe to the WSJ, discard all the news sections (written by reporters even more liberal than the NYT according to a recent survey), & just read the editorial section & book reviews.
(7) in flyover country, the place to go is northern WI (stay away from the People's Republic of Madison at all costs) on a Friday for Fish Fry! our northern version of the British fish & chips is ambrosia. the iodine-tasing crabcakes I find here in the mid-Atlantic just don't compare.
badgerwx
Understood, neo. I can only imagine the anguish that preceded the KC BBQ choice.
That was my attempt at sounding sincere and understanding.
Texas BBQ rules.
You could always cross the border for Mexican burritos or whatever they serve in Mexico.
Everything Rick said. When the South Bronx is the latest gentrifying neighborhood, you know NYC is doing pretty good.
If we can fix the transit system and its union, things will get even better.
This former Austinite says Texas BBQ rules.
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